You didn't say or do anything wrong here. You don't like her "taps" and asked her to stop. Most people would just apologize and try not to do it again. If she's going to get upset and stop bowling over it, that's not on you. You have every right to ask someone to stop doing something when it involves you getting hit or even tapped in a way that upsets you. I'm sorry this happened to you and that she didn't handle it better.