Infertility Women Unite!

[ariel03]

I have been going through infertility treatments for a while now and am starting to get discouraged. I was hoping to hear from other women going through infertility treatments too. I am afraid to give up on trying to have a kid and have to adopt later. My family really is looking forward to having a new member especially my mom. I am an only child so I am it for a grandchild for her. Thanks for hearing me out. Needed to tell someone other then DH.
Edited for a more family friendly topic.

[LibertyTreeGal]

Hi sweetheart,

I'm so sorry you are going through this! DH and I lost eight babies between 1999 and 2003

Our quest for parenthood ended in March 2001 through adoption and we couldn't possibly be happier, our boys are the greatest blessing and to top it all off we have an amazing birthmother as well. My icon is one of my precious sons.

If I could give one piece of advice (and it is echoed by many infertiles who are now happy parents) is not to remain childless in an endless quest over biology because once you hold your baby, you forget that you didn't give birth. It becomes a non-issue.

[Christine]

I am sorry you have been having so much trouble. I went through the very same things for five years. Like LibertyTreeGal, my quest to have a baby ended with the adoption of my beautiful little girl!

I truly believe there is a reason why some women cannot bear children...and it is because there are some women who cannot bear to KEEP their children!

You have to follow your own heart, but I can say (as LibertyTreeGal did), that my goal was a CHILD, not pregnancy. Once we got our baby, it made no difference to me that I didn't carry her physically.

Prayers to you!!!

[LibertyTreeGal]

cantgetenuff, it looks like you got as blessed as we did -- what a gorgeous girl!

I actually did, for a long time, desire to give birth, but the multiple pregnancies were literally killing me, physically and emotionally. While matched, four months before the boys were born, my best friend had her baby and I ended up in the delivery room because she wouldn't let me leave. That cured me. ICK! I did NOT want to go through all that.

[Christine]

ICK! I did NOT want to go through all that.

I know...I totally feel like I "dodged a bullet" by not getting pregnant and adopting!

Funny story...I was taking my daughter to the doctor for a check up at 7 days old (she was SLIGHTLY jaundiced when she was born, and they just wanted to see that she was past that).

So I get in the elevator, and this man says, "what a sweet baby...how old is she?"

So I answer "she is a week old today".

The man looks at me and says "You look GREAT!!!"

I just grinned and said thanks!!

[Goofeygal]

I was never able to get pregnet. We never did the fetility route we opted to adopt from Korea. We have 2 wonderful boys that could be no more like us had we given birth. So do not get discourged. Good luck to you both.

[Carol]

Can I please ask everyone to refrain from any graphic details of their treatment and condition? Feel free to use the private messaging for support and sharing of that nature.

It's a very sensitive and personal subject and we have a lot of young readers. Thanks.

Best of luck! I'm the proud Mom of 2 adopted children too.

[LibertyTreeGal]

Gosh, I don't want to know what triggered that! LOL

I've got two more funny stories. On the day my boys were born, one was in the regular nursery but one went to NICU. Well, I am barely 5'2" and was like 118 lbs and I met another mom of twins. She asks me how old my twins were and I said, "Oh, they were just born this morning!" She looks at my waistline and gave me the most evil and shocked stare you can imagine -- like, "NO WONDER your sons are in NICU -- starving yourself!" I told her they were adopted and then she liked me again and we became fast friends.

But the very, very best! When they were three weeks old, I went with them out to the store. At this point I weighed like 123lbs, just from sheer stress. So I am out with them and a woman comes up to me and asks how old they are and I tell her. She says, "Wow, you look great!" I put my hand on her shoulder and said, "Oh thanks so much, I have put on five pounds since they were born and really needed to hear that." I left her quite confused. Yes, it was evil, but when you have newborn twins you have to do something for entertainment

Goofeygal, are your sons twins, or brothers or did you simply adopt twice? If I were going international, I would probably opt for Korea myself (I remember looking into it because I was living in Idaho, which Korea is friendly with), but gosh, my two have me exhausted most of the time.

[kakn7294]

Ariel03, I really don't know what to say to you. I have never been in your shoes and can only imagine the pain and frustration you are experiencing. I was wondering how long you have been going through the treatments and what your doctor(s) has said about your chances to conceive through the treatments. Is adoption an option you are willing to consider? I know some people who have not been able to have biological children who have not adopted because they wouldn't feel the child was truly theirs - and in that case, I must agree that adoption would be wrong. I applaud all of you who have adopted - it's a wonderful thing to give a child a home and your love and your children are beautiful! It's what I would have chosen had we not been blessed with our DD's.

[Flower]

Ariel03,

Good luck with the treatments. We tried for 6 years to get pregnant, 1 MC, many drugs, etc, etc.

In September 2005 we were blessed with the news we were going to be parents of a little boy named Brandon, he was 18 months old when we got him. His adoption was just finalized May 11th, 2007. I cannot tell you just how much he has made a difference in mine and DH's lives, not to mention our families. He told my mom yesterday on the phone that she was his best friend! How sweet.

6 months into our adoption we went to WDW. I was extremely surprised to learn we came home with a 'Disney Souven'ear', no drugs, no treatments. His name is Benjamin and he is now 6.5 months old. I know how lucky I am to have gotten pregnant and to have carried him to term. I thank him everyday for coming to us!

Don't give up! I know how lucky I am, and I know how much it hurts you to hear of people having babies.