I guess I'm a bit surprised that this is as big and issue as it apparently is. I guess the interpretation of rudeness has wide variations. Even if I didn't what someone to join us, I wouldn't think it rude for someone to ask. What are they really hurting. And I certainly wouldn't get hostile with them about it.

This is just my opinion so don't take my head off, but I'd find it much more rude to be holding onto unused seats in a crowded dining room that to ask if someone minded if I sit down. I guess for me, it's not just about ME and what I WANT. We're not in this world alone, and a little kindness towards others is not really a bad thing.

I mean, it's not like they're going to sit in my lap. And it doesn't mean we have to strike up a conversation (although I probably would). They're just sitting beside me. They can have their own conversation and we can continue with ours.

I wonder, do the people who don't want to share a table also resist sharing a seat on a bus? Or sitting beside someone in a show?

Maybe it's a cultural difference, and varies depending on where you're from. If that's the case, I pretty ok with having a friendly midwestern point of view.

But that's all just my opinion. We all have different points of view, and it seems that mine is definitely in the minority. But nonetheless, is my view and I'm sticking to it.