Uncomfortable Situation- Just Have to Vent

[DVC2004]

My sister in law (husband's side) called the other day. Mind you we don't have a close relationship at all. We're friendly and cordial with eachother, but birthdays and Christmas are pretty much the only time we hear from them and vice versa. So anyway, she wants to do some sort of presentation in our home. Apparently she is trying to make some money. She was very sketchy on the details, really wouldn't go into what exactly this was other than describing it as "financial" (so it's not Mary Kay or Pampered Chef or anything like that, things I have heard of). And to top it off, she is bringing someone else (?) with to do the presentation because she says she is to observe them. Huh?

Husband felt like he couldn't say no but I must admit this makes me feel wierd. Not knowing what the company is or nature of this, plus coming over with someone into my home whom I do not know. We also aren't close as I mentioned and I absolutely will not be answering any questions or divulging info on my income, investments, etc. I feel so wierded out right now!!!

Also, I'm concerned about her as well. I am wondering if this is a pyramid scheme or something to the like and if she invested any "startup" fees, etc. She's not very savvy so to speak. I really hope she is not being duped or conned herself. Ugh! You ever get that feeling that something "just ain't right"? That is how I feel. Overreacting?

[NJGIRL]

I don't know your SIL but it sounds like she is being vague so you don't tell her not to come right off the bat. I can't tell you what to do but I can tell you with my personality I would call her back and tell her I want more details. If after she told me what it was and I was not interested I would tell her to come over for coffee and cake but not for the presentation. That's just the NJ in me. Straight and to the point

[ibelieveindisneymagic]

I agree with you, something doesn't feel quite right about this one...she's hoping to make money by taking your money ... even if it is legit, do you have a lot to spare?

Could you call her back, ask for some details and maybe arrange to meet her somewhere else, her house, a restaurant? That way, you can leave if you get too uncomfortable with the "presentation".

[prprincess]

Definitely call her back and get the details. It's your house, which is your safe haven, and if you feel uncomfortable with the entire thing, you have every right to say no.

[Marilyn Michetti]

I totally agree with the above.

[Ian]

I can virtually guarantee it's some pyramid scheme like Primerica or Amway or something .... I'd tell her thanks but no thanks.

[ozmom]

I can virtually guarantee it's some pyramid scheme like Primerica or Amway or something .... I'd tell her thanks but no thanks.

Also agree - it's a pyramid scheme, the big one around here now is the health antioxidant drinks. Had this happen to us someone wanted to show us something and bring along their manager, she was also very vague but we had a hunch what was going on, they came over and gave their pitch and we declined. I know these one require at least $500. investment. I would also politely decline.

[lovewalt]

We recieved one of these cryptic invitations a couple years ago.Sure enough it was a pyrimid scheme,pre-paid legal insurance or some such thing.They wouldn't accept our polite decline and badgered us until we had to be downright rude to get them to stop.Say NO and stand firm!

[crazypoohbear]

I say it is a pyramid scheme and they will not tell you what it is. they will talk your ear off and not answer any questions.
This happened to me once a long, time ago a friend brought her new boyfriend over to meet my DH and I and he started in about this great investment and how wonderful it is and how much it changed his life etc, etc.
I kept saying "Sounds like a pyramid scheme to me what's it called" He didn't answer
after several times of saying this'
I finally said'
"it's either a pyramid scheme, amway, a cult or all three and I am not interested."
I then said to my friend
" I thought you knew me better than this, why would you think I would be interested in joining a cult." Then I just laughed and said
Well, this part of the night is over end of the sales pitch, let's socialize now.
Oh, they ended up getting married and divorced in short order, When I saw him in the mall shopping I asked "why don't you just buy it through amway?"!! LOL

[gerald72]

I would have said no from the beginning, but if they MUST come over:
Say NO and stay firm Let them waste their time. And give them no information.
Remember, say NO!

[DVC2004]

I can virtually guarantee it's some pyramid scheme like Primerica or Amway or something .... I'd tell her thanks but no thanks.

I was asking my DH if she gave a company name (he was the one she spoke with) and he said he thought she said Tri-america, but I searched online and I bet it's Primerica! And boy is there alot of info out there on what a scam it is. Ugh! No way. The company's "business opportunity" website totes it as a way to educate people in finances which is even more ironic since my inlaws are not financially educated themselves (but that's another story).

She left a message earlier that she needs to reschedule the presentation- I will take this opportunity to call back and let her know I did some research and we are just not interested. I also feel obliged to direct her to the info I found on the web: I wonder if she did any research on this place before signing on to work for them.

[DVC2004]

I agree with you, something doesn't feel quite right about this one...she's hoping to make money by taking your money ... even if it is legit, do you have a lot to spare?

No, I don't have a little to spare even! In fact, right now is an especially bad time, too. We have had to cut back and it's looking like we will have to cancel our upcoming trip at this point.

That's how I feel, like she's involved, in a way, of possibly trying to rip us off.

I know times are tough and the holidays are approaching, but there are other ways to make an honest buck. It's just plain wierd.

[brownie]

I'd tell her no. It's best to not even let them in the door.

[thrillme]

I absolutely HATE those...(but then I got annoyed with Pampered Chef too). If I don't call you...I don't want it. It's a pyramid and she's been suckered into it. You'll say no...and if you're lucky...your husband won't be "guilted" into it.

Here's how to get out of it.

1. Find an Amway salesman...tell him/her you have a friend coming over that would like information. Invite them over...introduce them...offer them coffee and teacakes...the politely tell them "I'll let ya'll talk...and I'll be in the bedroom watching Survivor or whatever"...

2. Call and say something came up and you'll have to reschedule. Get back to them a couple of years from now when they realize it's a scam.

3. Tell them you've looked it up and you're not interested and don't feel comfortable with them bringing a stranger into the house. Stick by it and let her just deal with her hurt feelings. I'm big into family but...I will not participate in this kind of stuff...if they don't like it TOUGH...just one person I can cross off the Christmas list. I have told many friends and family members a polite but firm NO. Some opted not to talk to me again...others...no big deal nearly all of them have gotten out of the business.

My late husband was suckered into Amway once (I "tried" to warn him but...the warnings fell on deaf ears). I already knew what I needed to know because one of my previous boyfriends entire family got suckered in...they had two ways to "make money"...one...sucker your friends or two...sell the products...

My husband wanted to try it and I told him that I would NOT be part of getting friends involved. IF he mentioned that he was involved and someone said "I'd like to try it or...I really like their products...can I buy some". That wouldn't be so bad. Amazingly after he spent $125 on the "starter kit"...everybody else had already "tried it". Meh...I just accepted the fact that I had a fairly good supply of overpriced products and let it go. In the end...his "observing friend" that brought over "the professional" made practically nothing in the business then realized that this "professional" was putting in as much as 80 hours a week to "possibly" make up to "maybe" $1000 a month as a part time job...which didn't include the "costs" of traveling sometimes up to 4 hours away... Uhhhh....

Bottom line...if you ain't the "lead" dog in these businesses...the scenery never changes.

[PAYROLL PRINCESS]

This is right up there with time share spiels in my book. Just say no and do it before they get into your house. Their like rodents-hard to get rid of!

[garymacd]

Yup. Sounds like Amway to me, too.

Stay away, foul beast!

[DonLefNY]

I was asking my DH if she gave a company name (he was the one she spoke with) and he said he thought she said Tri-america, but I searched online and I bet it's Primerica! And boy is there alot of info out there on what a scam it is.................

One of my brother in laws got sucked into Primerica. He had to pay for his "training", pay to take the state exam (which he flunked) and then pay to be trained again. I think he paid over $500 for the two training classes plus the state exam fee.

This same BiL got sucked into Amway, Shakley and New Skin over the years. He's always looking for a way to a quick million $.

[crazypoohbear]

Just curious what the outcome was?

[DVC2004]

Just curious what the outcome was?

Well it's my husband's sister so he told me don't call her,he "will handle it"- which translates to he avoided her. So then she called Monday night while we were eating dinner and said she was on her way over. He called her right back and said don't come, we're busy. The very next day she called again and wanted to come Saturday (we actually are going to a wedding all day). He finally called her and pressed her for info; she did admit that it is Primerica. He told her we read alot of bad stuff online and we aren't going to buy. She said that is fine but all she wants to do is the presentation (right).

Bottom line- once again he didn't tell her no, just said we are busy so she said she will call us in a couple weeks. Sigh. He thinks by then she will quit but she won't. Maybe I should come up with some "sudden plans" on the presentation night, since he doesn't want to tell her no. Then he can listen to the presentation. I don't know why, other than maybe he doesn't want to hurt her feelings, but I warned him about how it's going to go and I can almost gaurantee it won't go well. Nothing ever does with her, then throw this into the mix plus the "presenter" she is bringing along.

[SBETigg]

If you do end up having her meeting, I would print up all the information on the scam that you find online and do a presentation of your own right back to the SIL and representative.